Friday, 30 March 2012

I dont believe it, Gary Lineker is my wife!

I'm actually fairly tired today after an extremely eventful nights dreaming. And talking, according to my wife.

Firstly I notice Gary Lineker is unconscious in the street, instead of helping him I search his pockets, locate the keys to his Aston Martin and take it for a spin.
I return, wake him but as he wakes he transforms into my wife.
I inform her I'm going fishing and jump into a nearby river in full diving gear and start to shoot the fish with an electric stun gun.

Next I'm in a large flat that needs decorating. One of my old bosses, Chris is telling me the flat is mine if I want it. I walk into another room to find Chris is now my Father in law. I put some hand cream on from a tub that says, 'I don't believe it' on the label. It's a calming cream to relieve stress made by Victor Meldrew.

I get awoken by my mum, (still dreaming), she tells me it's time for work and then goes and wakes my younger sister.
When my sister is in the bathroom my mum finds a half eaten Cadburys Flake in her bed. She winks at me and starts to eat it just as my sister returns and gives her a disapproving look.

Finally I am walking through an unknown picturesque little village in search of a road sign to point me in the direction of a village called Stoke Doyle in Northamptonshire.

I am carrying a bird seed dispenser and it is leaking as I walk but there are cat treats dropping out leaving a trail as I go.
I turn a corner to find a full blown riot happening before my eyes. Cars are over turned and buildings are ablaze.
Suddenly a policeman on a horse is totally engulfed in flames as a petrol bomb hits them.

I awoke at this point, (for real), with the song "Don't Stop Believin'"a popular tune by the American rock band Journey from 1981

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